Call me an old softie...

But I'm still a sucker for a grand romantic gesture.

This is like pure, triple-distilled desperation. Guys, this isn't some kind of noble gesture. This is weird, predatory grossness. 

 I believe every girl deserves a second chance and I want to be the guy who gives it to you.

Honestly I feel like if you're the kind of person to write this, you're beyond any explanation as to why it's so fucking terrible. But the whole "kindness of strangers" thing should extend to smiling politely or maybe holding the door for the person behind you. "I'll capitalize on what may be a severe low point in your life and hope you're desperate enough to give me a chance" is not a kindness. It's fucking creepy.

Props to the guy for that 30-60 day expiration date though. Wouldn't want to come off as too needy.


We're Living in the Future

I dish out more than my fair share of snark and sarcasm and bitter resentment towards anyone I judge to be more successful than me, but sometimes you just have to appreciate the world we live in. For instance, a blind guy can see now:

If that doesn't melt whatever cold dead thing sits in place of your heart, I don't know what will!

(and yes I'm jealous because I'm trying to figure out an analogous experience to seeing for the first time in 20 years and coming up blank)