10.27.2009

My Latest Feature: Lame White People

If there's anyone who can make lame an art, it's white people. And even a cursory glance at the internet reveals a startlingly large amount of them like to plaster their pictures up on the internet for me to mock.

Like this guy. I realize this is just somebody's headshot, probably for his dental office or something, but the plastic smile, weird doll hair, and static, piercing eyes make this guy just half a shade off from rapist. Seriously, ladies: would you accept a drink this guy handed you at a bar? Worse than rape, he'd probably get you drunk to go home and talk about bible verses.

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