1.02.2009

Manic Monday: Oh AirTran, you silly racist bastards.

By now you've probably heard about the Muslim family that was booted off a plane after the other passengers got antsy about...well, the fact that they were Muslim.

Which is a sad, sad commentary on the state in which we live today. I get it; the news shows you grainy photo after grainy photo of olive-skinned jihadists and pronounces them all EVIL EVIL EVIL!!!! So naturally that starts seeping into your brain and you get a little gun-shy when you see some in person. It's tough to avoid given the constant overriding stimulus of "Muslims = terrorists" you get every day.

The people on the plane need to exercise a little more critical thinking, though.

Passengers notified flight attendants of a "suspicious conversation" between Kashif Irfan and his wife. Now certainly no one can fault a concerned citizen for notifying an authority (or, at the very least, a flight attendant) when they hear ol' Mahmoud thanking Allah for a glorious day to die or analyzing how best to ram a Bic ballpoint pen through a pilot's temple. The fact that he was with his wife, sister, three children, brother, and sister-in-law could just be a clever ploy to divert attention. Don't put it past ol' Al Qaeda to send a few kids in to die in a fiery crash if it means scoring a hit on that symbol of all that is evil in America: Orlando, Florida.

Yeah. They were flying to Orlando. They were flying home to Orlando.

But their conversation, however innocent, must've had some trigger word in it to set off whichever paranoid soccer mom blew the whistle. Maybe Kashif is a struggling stand-up comedian and was talking about bombing his set. Maybe his wife was coming down from a wicked caffeine rush and mentioned she was crashing hard. Maybe Kashif's son was playing a new PSP game and talked about how the graphics are so realistic when his soldier terrorizes a plane full of civilians and rams it into the nearest skyscraper in a horrific and monstrous act of cruelty.

"The conversation, as we were walking through the plane trying to find our seats, was just about where the safest place in an airplane is," said Inayet Sahin, Kashif Irfan's wife.

For real? You people saw some Muslims, heard them talk about safety, and put two and two together to equal planes crashing into towers? Here's a hint, guy: the Muslim you need to watch out for is the one who doesn't give a shit about safety. The guy who asks if he can open his window, doesn't fasten his seat belt, and orders a double whiskey is the one who may or may not be plotting to convert your plane into several hundred much smaller pieces.

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